A sooner, a longhorn and a deacon entered a bar….

[NBC 5]

Aggravated assault charges have been filed against a church deacon and a University of Oklahoma Sooners fan after officials say he grabbed a University of Texas fan between the legs during a scuffle in an Oklahoma bar. A couple of months before the annual Red River Shootout between the Sooners and Longhorns, words were exchanged at Henry Hudson’s Pub between a Sooner fan/deacon and a Longhorn fan. Witnesses said it was because Longhorn fan was wearing a UT T-shirt.

The church deacon makes his living as a government auditor and had gone to the bar that night for one reason — to play darts.

Read about it here.

[From me]

Darts? They don’t have a dart board in the Family Life Center?

This sounds like a great joke. I’m just glad it didn’t happen between Bama and Auburn. Truth is better than fiction.

[HT] Monk in Training

Man ‘Angry With God’ Drives Into Church

[Local 6]

A 23-year-old St. Augustine man who told deputies he was “angry with God” and intentionally drove his pickup truck into a Catholic church Tuesday morning, according to the St. Johns County Sheriff’s Office.

Read about it here.

[From me]

I’ve been angry before, but I didn’t drive my car into a church or anywhere else.  Why is it when people get angry about life they take it out on others?

What do you think?

Family Grows $500,000 Pot In Church

[From WXYZ]

The Macomb County Sheriff’s Department says it’s dismantled a wildly illegal family business — a huge marijuana operation based in a former church building.

Read about it here.

[From me]

And people have been arguing over alcohol?  Was this part of a building program?

‘God’ gets arrested?

[From NWI.com]

A man claiming to be God wanted his slippers — right now. Instead, he was arrested at a  Payless Shoes store. The man moved closer to the employees and told them he was God.

“He said ‘When God speaks to you you’re supposed to give him everything,’”

Read about it here.

[From me]

I didn’t know God wore slippers.  I thought He was sandals being.

Father of the year?

[From Victoria Advocate]

A man arrested Saturday night after a routine traffic stop in Texas told deputies that the cocaine found in his vehicle was a graduation present for his son in Houston.

Read about it here.

[From me]

What happened to just getting laundered $$?

I thought the only way Frosty could die is to melt…

[From Key TV]

Two Christmas grinches were arrested Monday, accused of stabbing a 12-foot-tall inflatable Frosty the snowman with a screwdriver.

Read about it and watch the video here.

[From me]

Drug dealer calls 911 to report stolen pot!

[WLS]

A Wichita, KS man called 911 to report he was the victim of an armed robbery. What was stolen? A pound of marijuana worth about $1,100 that he had been trying to sell at his home.

Read about it here.

[From me]

Remember what Confucius said:

“One who stands on toilet, gets high on pot.”